Padded cups for kids—am I losing my mind?

Hi, everyone!
Sorry, but I just need to vent a little right now. I hope you don’t hold it against me—maybe I’m just a little too old-fashioned—but:
I was out shopping with my daughter yesterday; she’s almost 11 now and wanted bustiers instead of undershirts.
I was shocked to find that almost every store was stocked almost exclusively with PADDED CHILDREN’S BRAS. Starting at size 128, with lace and all kinds of variations.
Did I miss something? I mean, it’s not like you have to pad CHILDREN! What happened to those good old bustiers for the start of puberty???
After a looooot of searching, we actually found two simple sets, but I’m still upset. Do little girls really have to start faking it already? Maybe you guys see it differently—I’m really curious to hear your opinions (and if anyone knows a good store where you can still get unpadded bustiers, I’d be grateful for any tips)
Best, your Nadeleule
Mel

Hi Mel,

I totally get where you’re coming from. My daughter is only 8, but I had the same problem with sandals at the start of summer. I searched for four weeks before I finally found some without heels that fit her.
  Fashion aside, kids—and even older children—are still far from being little ladies. (Though I do like to joke about that with my little one.) And that’s why, in my opinion, they don’t need to be dressed up like that—whether they want to or not.
Thanks to shows like *Germany’s Next Top Model* and the like, that idea is practically fed to them.
  That reminds me—I heard somewhere that the target audience for these shows is girls between 3 and 14. I don’t know if that was meant seriously, but I was stunned.

Now, finally, on to the bustiers. Ernstings should have some, and I think I’ve already seen some at Action.

Best regards and good luck with your search, Birgit 

@ Birgit: It’s nice to know there are still “old-fashioned people” like me out there :D
Ernstings was the first place I went to yesterday… but they ONLY had padded children’s bras. I’ll try my luck at Action—we have several of those stores nearby. And soon, 3-year-olds will be going to daycare wearing makeup… where is all this headed???

Hi Mel,
Since we only have boys in our family, I hadn’t really noticed the trend of padded bras for girls. I have noticed, though, that it seems like padded bras are all that’s available for women these days, and since I don’t really like them, I ordered some unpadded ones from a catalog. Maybe they have something in children’s sizes there, too.
Best wishes, Jana

Hi everyone,

I don’t have kids of my own yet, but I totally get where you’re coming from.

I wouldn’t want my daughter—if I had one—to walk around looking like a little Lolita either.

I can really only shake my head when I sometimes walk through town and see girls around 14 years old strutting around in miniskirts or hot pants—and I wonder where they even fit their underwear underneath.

This might be a bit off-topic from the original question, but the “sex sells” madness really should stop when it comes to children.

I think decorative children’s makeup is just as ridiculous.

I saw it again just the other day: a complete makeup palette “for especially young skin.” Not just carnival stuff, but real lip gloss, mascara, blush, and so on.

What on earth does an 8- to 10-year-old need that for???

Ich hab auch eine junge Dame im Bekanntenkreis, die ihre Tochter seit einem Jahr geschminkt in die Schule gehen lässt... Die Tochter ist jetzt in der 2. Klasse.... Von Hotpants und sehr "erwachsenen" Tops mal ganz abgesehen...

Muss meiner Meinung nach nicht sein.

Deine Frage kann ich dir aber leider nicht beantworten, leider weiß ich nicht, wo es sowas gibt... sorry. 

So, first things first. Maybe have a look at Ernstings’ online shop. I got that information from Google. But I can well imagine that the unpadded ones are bought less often and therefore just aren’t kept in stock in the stores.

Hehe, I like “old-fashioned” — I’ll take that as a compliment. Thank you very much. Actually, where we live, I’m probably the coolest mom around (at least at first glance), but at the same time I’m often also the fussiest when it comes to my views.

My daughter has makeup too (real makeup, because I took that parrot-colored cardboard stuff away from her, and she’s not getting mine), and the girls have huge fun putting on makeup and doing their hair, and ideally also pulling the Sunday dress out of the wardrobe. And up to that point, I’m okay with it too.

BUT no 8-year-old of mine is going out the door wearing makeup! Not even for 5 minutes straight across the street back home. And not even if the powder and mascara (dried out — because I’m even smarter than the girls) are hardly visible. By now, all her friends are used to that too and know where the wet wipes are. :-D

I don’t think strictly forbidding everything is always good. Whatever it is, a little rule-bending and clear boundaries are OK for me.
I hope that attitude will work out. So far, things are still going quite well with the 10-year-old boys. For the boys, I’m (at least for the moment) someone who goes along with almost any nonsense, but when it’s enough, it’s enough. And much more important to me is that they listen when I come out with, “Hey, I know that’s cool, but ... and that’s why you should leave it alone. I’ve already fallen flat on my face often enough!”

Hallo Nadeleule,

auf www.bonprix.de hab ich diverse Kinder Bustiers gesehen. Da stand zumindest nichts von Polsterung bei der Beschreibung.

Wäre das was für euch? Ggf. könnt ihr alles zurück schicken...

LG

Actually, I’ve always considered myself pretty laid-back, and now it’s not my own kids who are driving me up the wall, but the clothes marketed to kids....
We’ve also had discussions here about makeup. My daughter wanted children’s makeup; I didn’t allow it because that stuff is suspected of being carcinogenic, and I think it’s over the top at that age. When she started 5th grade at the Gymnasium, one girl was wearing makeup and was looked at strangely by everyone else because of it. She hasn’t worn makeup since.
I gave my daughter an empty mascara wand. She wets it with water and “coats” her eyelashes with it. She thinks she looks so chic, and I’m happy with that :D I should add that I don’t wear much makeup myself (just mascara and eyeliner).
During Carnival, the young lady can wear a little more.

I’ll take a look online to see if I can find something there—thank you so much for the tips (especially to those of you who are “childless” yourselves and took the time to look around for me). 

Hi, so we’re not quite at the puberty stage here yet, but I also often struggle to find the right, age-appropriate outfit.

I think even an 11- or 12-year-old doesn’t need to dress like Madonna yet—padding her bust and wearing heels. Makeup is another issue—I’d say lip gloss is okay, but anything else is a no-go.

At 13 or 14, of course, it’ll be a whole different story, but even then, there’s no need to go overboard.

So I totally get what you’re talking about—I recently saw some simple bustiers at C&A.

So mische auch mal mit.

Meine Tochter ist 7 Jahre alt.
Mit neuen Schuhen kenne ich leider auch nur so, das ich oft die Augen aufreiße denn die haben in Größe 32 mehr Absatz als ich tragen würde.
Meine Maus hat aber ihren großen Bruder als Vorbild und trägt noch nur Schuhe die er als cool bezeichnet. Und somit trägt sie Jungens-Schuhe. Ohne Absatz, dafür mit viel BlinkBlink bei der Sole. Ich bete das dieser Zustand lange anhält.

Unterwäsche halte ich mich raus, wir haben jetzt schon Diskussionen, weil sie mir schon erklärt sie zieht im Winter sicher keine Unterleibchen an. Na ich habe das mal verschoben bis es wirklich kalt ist.
Sonst ist bei Klamotten Hosen angesagt. Entweder lange oder solche die bis unters Knie gehen. Also von ihr aus. Und sonst Minikleider für den Sommer, was für eine 7-jährige ganz OK ist. Schaut echt süß aus, wird aber wenn sie älter wird auch nicht mehr gehen.....
Röcke liebt sie in Maxi, da bin wohl ich das Vorbild.

Schminken kommt bei mir nicht in Frage. Von der Kusine die Tochter geht seit sie 10 ist nicht mehr ungeschminkt aus dem Haus. Damals habe ich mir schon gedacht: meine Tochter sicher nicht.
Gilt für Gesicht und die Nägel.
Aber es gibt kein absolutes Verbot. Sie hat Kinderschminkzeug, und den Hinweis von ungesund kenne ich, egal ob Kinderschminke oder normale Schminke.
Wenn aber eine Freundin kommt dürfen sie sich Schminken (sieht dann aus als wären sie auf Kriegspfad), nach dem Spielen muss aber alles wieder runter.
Die ersten 2-3 Mal war das der absolute Hit, inzwischen interessiert sie es nicht mehr und die Schminke liegt unbeachtet in einer Schachtel unter dem Bett.

Ob mich meine Tochter in ein paar Jahren für total überholt hält, weil ich sie nicht geschminkt in die Schule lasse ist mir eigentlich egal. Schule ist kein Laufsteg.

Das sage ich meiner Tochter auch oft: Du gehst zur Schule und nicht zur Miss-Wahl! 

@ Pe-ka : Das Problem mit den Unterhemden hatte ich mit meinem Sohn auch. Ich hab irgendwann aufgegeben. Seit dem trägt er statt Unterhemden T-Shirts drunter. Das war für ihm ok und mir ist es eigentlich auch egal was solange er es in die Hose steckt. 

...Auch, wenn ich selbst ja kinderlos bin, mal einen Tipp: Wenn eure viel zu jungen Mädels mal geschminkt in die Schule gehen wollen und ihr könnt sie nicht davon abhalten: lasst sie machen. Und zwar in der Menge, wie sie wollen!

Ich hab das einmal mit 11 heimlich gemacht, hab mich geschminkt ohne Ende, Lidschatten in einem schrecklichen blau, Einen Lidstrich, der schrecklich aussah,.... 

Die Blicke und das Gegrinse der anderen Schüler(/innen) hat dann schon dafür gesorgt, dass ich dann für eine laaange Zeit kein Bock mehr auf Schminke hatte :D 

Dear Nadeleule,
I found unpadded bustiers at H&M.

Best, tina

Dear Tina, thank you so much! I’ll definitely make it to H&M next week